From the Cracker Squire Archives: "This is my stand. I will not retreat from it. I will not compromise."

Jim Galloway aptly describes the GOP House leadership problems that are dominating political disussions around the State as "the current zipper situation" (see AJC Political Insider).

For some reason this morning I recalled the speech on distilled spirits that was delivered by the Mississippi legislator Noah S. “Soggy” Sweat in 1952 as reported by Jim Galloway on January 25, 2007.

Don't you just know that the Republican caucus would give anything if whiskey or pari-mutuel betting or other thing else in the world but zippers was the question du jour as the caucus meets Friday to discuss the preliminaries of an election to replace Speaker Glenn Richardson.

Anyway, back to my recollection about Judge Noah S. Sweat and his "whiskey speech," considered a classic example of political doublespeak, which follows:

“You have asked me how I feel about whiskey. All right, here is how I feel about whiskey.

“If when you say whiskey you mean the devil’s brew, the poison scourge, the bloody monster, that defiles innocence, dethrones reason, destroys the home, creates misery and poverty, yea, literally takes the bread from the mouths of little children; if you mean the evil drink that topples the Christian man and woman from the pinnacle of righteous, gracious living into the bottomless pit of degradation, and despair, and shame and helplessness, and hopelessness, then certainly I am against it.

“But;

“If when you say whiskey you mean the oil of conversation, the philosophic wine, the ale that is consumed when good fellows get together, that puts a song in their hearts and laughter on their lips, and the warm glow of contentment in their eyes; if you mean Christmas cheer; if you mean the stimulating drink that puts the spring in the old gentleman’s step on a frosty, crispy morning; if you mean the drink which enables a man to magnify his joy, and his happiness, and to forget, if only for a little while, life’s great tragedies, and heartaches, and sorrows; if you mean that drink, the sale of which pours into our treasuries untold millions of dollars, which are used to provide tender care for our little crippled children, our blind, our deaf, our dumb, our pitiful aged and infirm; to build highways and hospitals and schools, then certainly I am for it.

“This is my stand. I will not retreat from it. I will not compromise.”